In this article we will we will discuss divorce mediation tips. If you are contemplating divorce or in the midst of a divorce, you know the pressures of the legal process do not compare to the emotional turmoil you are experiencing. During the divorce, you process a variety of thoughts and emotions. How did I get here? Will I be able to retire? Am I going to be financially okay?

When you have this much to process and then are required to go through the court system, it is rather scary and uneasy. To make matters worse, couples will rush and hire attorneys only intensifying the anger, bitterness, and fear that exist. You can also find some good mediation tips here.  The average length of a litigated divorce can take two years!

Mediation offers the couples the attention they deserve. At Families First Mediation, with a few sessions, you and your spouse can be guided through all the issues to make meaningful agreements. With those agreements, we will prepare all the paperwork, from filing the petition to the divorce decree, so you never have to go to court. This can be done as quick or slow as you need.

Here are our Top 5 Divorce Mediation Tips:

Divorce Mediation Tip 1: Have a Divorce Process Vision.  Don’t focus on what you want, but how you want to proceed in your divorce.  Remind yourself of that vision throughout the process.

Divorce Mediation Tip 2: Listen to your spouse’s intention.  Often, we are so hurt by our spouse it clouds our reception of information. In the same way, we struggle with communicating when we are stressed. More than ever, you need to listen carefully & be patient. Finding the right mediator is essential.

Divorce Mediation Tip 3: Understand your goals & why you have those goals. This will help you communicate what you want in mediation or with your spouse.

Divorce Mediation Tip 4: Spend time understanding your assets & debts. Divorce is still a legal process. You will be required to complete financial forms. Knowledge is key.

Divorce Mediation Tip 5: Surround yourself with supportive family & friends. Divorce can be lonely and stressful time. The extra help is money in the bank.

Here are our Top 5 Custody Mediation Tips:

Custody Mediation Tip 1: Always let your children know you love them. This can’t be emphasized enough during a divorce. They need to be assured that they are not at fault.

Custody Mediation Tip 2: When you first tell your children about the divorce, the best option is to do so with both parents. Again, the focus is that you both love them very much. Keep the conversation age appropriate and do not blame each other.

Custody Mediation Tip 3: Keep your focus on what’s best for your children. Often, we get entrenched in our positions that we forget the bigger picture!

Custody Mediation Tip 4: Be flexible. Life is all about how you handle change. This may include visitation flexibility or helping the other parent.

Custody Mediation Tip 5: Surround yourself with family and friends. The divorce and custody transition is tough. When your children are with the other parent, plan fun activities for yourself.

If you are have questions about mediation or need additional guidance, give Families First Mediation a call at (408) 357-3486 or email us here, so we can help answer your questions!