Providing Divorce Mediation Services Throughout California

Divorce Mediation Checklist: 90 Items & with free PDF

Dina Haddad

Principal & Founder Attorney-Mediator

Child Custody Mediation
Divorce mediation can help you complete your divorce process effectively and efficiently with professional help.

What is Divorce Mediation?

Divorce mediation is a cooperative process. Once you start, a neutral third party will help you in your separation with your partner. A mediator can assist those who have simple matters to more complex cases.

Some couples that mediate generally have an idea of how to resolve their matter; and others, have many places of disagreement. In either case, the mediator is skilled to assist the couple to get through their divorce efficiently and effectively with a high-quality agreement at the end. 

Contact us at Families First Mediation today, today and schedule your  free consultation.

Key Takeaways

  • The importance of a divorce mediation checklist;
  • What to prepare and discuss in your mediation sessions;
  • Checklist for finding and choosing the best mediator for you;
  • The best divorce mediation service in California. 

Download Your Divorce Mediation Checklist Here

Our printable, 90-item divorce mediation checklist can help you prepare better during your mediation session, leading to the productive and amicable divorce in California.

Divorce Mediation Comprehensive Checklist Ideas

We have created a detailed checklist for spouses who want to seek productive and amicable divorce. 

The following are the eight checklist ideas to help you prepare better:

What to Bring in Divorce Mediation

Before you get to your divorce mediation session in California, there are a few things you need to prepare:  

    Financial Documents: Tax returns, pay stubs, bank statements, credit card statements, mortgage documents, loan agreements, investment and retirement account statements, list of assets and debts.

    Property Information: House deeds, vehicle titles, and appraisals for any valuable items you bought during the marriage.

    Insurance Policies: Make sure to bring any health, life, auto, and home insurance details. If you don’t have them, reach out to your insurance companies and they can upload you a digital copy. 

    Employment Details: This is an important one, you will want to bring work contracts you are a part of and benefits information (especially if you are discussing spousal or child support).  

    Children’s Information: You will want to provide the accounts you have for your children, including 529 accounts.

If you have any questions about what else you should bring, you can contact your divorce mediator, and they can give you a more comprehensive list based around your situation.

What to Discuss in Divorce Mediation

Besides things that you should bring to your divorce mediation sessions, here is what you can write down in your divorce mediation checklist on things you will want to discuss: 

    General topics that you think must be discussed between you and your soon to be ex-spouse. 

    A postnuptial agreement if you got one after you two were married.  

    Discuss the terms of your prenup (if applicable) and what you already owned before marriage. 

    Assets and liability related information. 

    Child custody and parenting plans that are related to your divorce. 

    Property division and finances. 

    Alimony. 

    Final Agreement – will it be drafted for you as a Marital Settlement Agreement?  

    Insurance information regarding your life, car, or health plans. (which as said earlier, is why you should bring that information with you). 

    Tax return statements. 

    Stocks & bonds that you or your ex-spouse have invested into after you were married.  

    Areas of agreement that you and your ex-partner have already settled outside of mediation.

Parenting in Divorce Mediation

Divorce mediation can be a bit more complex for parents who are also seeking custody mediation. Have a look at our blog Do’s & Don’ts of Custody Mediation to get an idea of the basics. 

    Custody arrangement: who will have legal and physical custody, make sure to let the mediator know of your preferences and why you prefer them.

    Parenting Schedule: 
       Regular Schedule
       Summer Schedule/Summer Vacation
       Holiday Schedule.

    Child’s education: What does your school choice look like? If it’s not public school, what would be the costs? You can use mediation to discuss making this decision with your ex-partner.

    Extracurricular activities: What kinds of outside of school activities will your child or children be participating in? What do the schedules look like and how will you split the cost with your co-parent? 

    Co-Parenting Agreements
       Introduction to romantic interests
       Access to firearms in the home
       International travel
       Travel outside the state of California
       Make up time (especially if you travel for work)
       Access to child during non-custodial time such as reasonable video and phone calls

Child Support and Alimony

When you are addressing financial support in divorce mediation, you need to make a plan around child support and alimony (spousal support).  Here is a checklist to guide your discussions: 

    Income documentation from both parties. 

    Calculation of child support based on California guidelines. 

    How long the support payments will remain in effect. 

    The payment schedule and method. 

    Health insurance coverage for children. 

    Sharing of uninsured medical expenses. 

    Childcare costs division. 

    Educational expenses for children. 

    Tax implications of support payments. 

    Conditions for modifying support.

Finances and Divorce Mediation

Finances are a big discussion during divorce mediation. Your mediator will want to get you both to a place that you are equally well-off at. 

This means that they will need to do a thorough examination of your financial situation. By providing these documents it will guarantee that your settlement is a fair one.

1. Assets

    Real estate documents (deeds and/or appraisals)

    Vehicle titles and valuations. 

    Personal property inventory. 

    Investment and retirement account statements. 

    Stock schedules for employee benefits like Restricted Stock Units, Performance Stock Units, and Stock Options.

    Documentation of separate property claims. 

    Records of inheritances or gifts. 

    Tracing documents for any separate property claims (such as use of inheritance to a down payment of a house).

2. Income

    Tax returns from the last three years.

    Employment contracts you are currently involved in and the benefit information for those. 

    Business financial records (if any). 

    Last two months of pay stubs.

3. Liabilities

    Credit card statements.

    Loan documents that you might have. 

    Your mortgage statements. 

    Debt repayment plans you are involved in. 

    Credit reports for both parties.

4. Insurance

    Life insurance policies you have. 

    Health insurance costs and policies. 

    Property insurance for your home.

5. Pets

    Proof of ownership and your care arrangements for the pets involved. 

    Pet-related expenses like food, medical care, and grooming.

6. Other financial statements

    Bank statements for all accounts that you currently have open or have opened during the marriage. 

    Current budget and projected post-divorce expenses. 

    If you have them, any prenuptial or postnuptial agreements that have been signed.

Martial Documents in Divorce Mediation Sessions

We know there are several documents that come into play in divorce mediation. But these papers can provide important context and legal backing in your separation. 

    Find your marriage certificate and bring it with you to mediation. 

    Separation agreement if you and your ex-spouse have already drafted one. 

    Wills and trusts if you have already written your will. 

    Your power of attorney documents in the event something happened during the divorce. 

     Family business agreements or contracts. 

    Domestic partnership agreements (if you have one).

Should I Mediate?

Consider the following to decide if you should mediate?

     Both my spouse and I are willing to attend.

     We want to keep our matter private.

    We want to stay in control of our divorce (and not give that power to a judge).

    We are willing to communicate or negotiate with one another.

    We want to save time, money and our resources.

Divorce mediation can be an amazing way to resolve conflicts and find solutions to problems, but it’s not fit for every situation.  Before you decide that you want to go through with mediation sessions, you might want to self-evaluate and find out if mediation is appropriate for your circumstances.  Factors like power imbalances, domestic violence, or other extreme situations can impact if mediation is the best choice or not. In some cases, more traditional routes would be more appropriate. To learn more about if mediation is the right path for you, read our article When Divorce Mediation is Not Recommended.

Finding the Best Divorce Mediator in California

To make sure that your divorce mediation process goes well, you should do your research. That way you can find the best mediator for your situation. 

     Learn about the mediator’s qualifications and experience: You can evaluate if your mediator is qualified to take on your divorce case. 

    Choose a divorce mediator that will work with your schedule. Do you need a remote service? Do you want it in person? . 

     Make a shortlist of mediators after some investigation: This way you can narrow down who you and your ex-partner feel comfortable sitting down with for mediation. 

     Schedule an initial consultation with each mediator on your shortlist: Talk to them more, find out if they are the right fit for you. 

     Finalize your selection and hire the best mediator that you find fit. 

Make sure you ask about how much each mediator will charge so that you can get a rate that fits within your budget. The best mediator that we recommend is Dina Haddad. Reach out to her today so that you can get the ball rolling with your free consultation.

Questions to Ask Your Mediator in a Free Consultation

Here are some questions that you can ask your mediator in your free consultation when looking for the right mediator: 

For more frequently asked questions, visit our site Families First Mediation and have a look at some of our other blog posts.

How can a Divorce Mediation Checklist Help?

A divorce mediation checklist will outline key topics and documents you will need for your divorce mediation. The more prepared you are with your documents, the quicker and more productive your mediation sessions. 

At Families First Mediation, we provide our couples a “Preparation for the First Working Session,” packet. This provides detailed instructions on how to prepare for the mediation; what documents are needed and how to disclose them; mediation ground rules; and even a secured location to upload the required financial documents. Making sure that you prepare thoroughly, and that all important issues you wanted brought up are addressed. Having one is one of our many Tips & Tricks to Make Your Divorce Easier.

Best Divorce Mediation Service in California

The best divorce mediation service that you can find in California would be Families First Mediation. At Families First Mediation, the name is self-explanatory. They put you and your families first. 

They have a comprehensive working formula that has guaranteed happy clients through the years with their team of mediators who have over twenty years of family law experience. Their head mediator, Dina Haddad, can talk with you and schedule a free consultation. Don’t wait, if you want to finalize your divorce as quickly as possible, get your documents together for when you set up your first session at Families First Mediation.

Summary

In summary if you are currently going through divorce (or if you are even just planning one for the future. Make sure to go over our Divorce Mediation checklist if you plan on going through mediation. 

It can help everyone involved to keep things smooth and straightforward. No one wants their divorce to drag on for months or years at a time comparable to traditional court.

Frequently Asked Questions

Try to avoid making nearly impossible ultimatums or using accusatory language. Bringing up past grievances that are unrelated to the divorce can derail your session.

To survive divorce mediation, approach it with a calm and open mind. Try to keep your focus on compromising and making long-term solutions rather than going for short-term wins.

To prepare for divorce mediation in California, read through our checklist of things to gather before your mediation session.

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