Providing Divorce Mediation Services Throughout California
Providing Divorce Mediation Services Throughout California
Dina Haddad and her team provide expert mediation services for Californians. If you want help related to any family law issue, call us or book a consult.
Yes, you can lose custody for not/bad co parenting. Harm, blocking visitation, ignoring, etc., can result in losing co-parenting. Book a free consult with a co-parenting mediator.
Imagine Sarah and John, two California parents, locked in a terrible custody battle. Why? Their co-parenting approach had completely broken down.
California law requires separated parents to work together for the sake of their children. A failure to do this makes things more difficult not just for the parents but also for children.
This guide will help you understand when poor co-operation actually threatens your custody rights. We will identify those risky situations and outline practical strategies for managing conflict and protecting your time with your child.
Are you feeling stressed? Sorting out co-parenting problems with an expert mediator, outside of court and without expensive lawyers, usually makes things much easier.
Mediate your co-parenting disputes outside the court with expert Co-parenting mediator, Dina Haddad to simplify child support and co-parenting and reducing conflict for parents and child. Book her FREE consultation today.
Co-parenting means separated parents are working together to make significant decisions concerning the child’s health, education, and well-being.
Consider decisions such as where to go to school, what major medical care or treatment a child will have, or what type of religious upbringing will occur.
There are some common misconceptions:
In simple words, co-parenting is about making real efforts, not being perfect.
Yes, it’s possible, but losing all rights is usually reserved for extreme cases. This is true whether the parents were married or unmarried, or a non-biological legal guardian. California wants as many parents to co-parent as possible.
Courts can decrease parenting time, require supervised visits, grant one parent sole legal custody and (for extreme cases) terminate rights for abuse, or abduction. Here are some common reasons courts will modify custody obligations:
The ability to co-parent with a narcissist is very common, and courts are aware of this dynamic.
California law (like Family Code §3020, §3040) requires parents to communicate, share information, and put the child’s best interests ahead of their own disagreements. If parents repeatedly fail to do this, it may affect their custody or visitation rights.
Ignoring a court order regarding access is a serious matter. Most courts in California can respond strongly. You can certainly be subject to legal consequences and potentially be charged with a felony depending on the conditions, for example if you move out of state against a prior custody order.
The legal consequences of violating a custody order will vary depending on the circumstances. Still, it often leads to a change in the custody order to further restrict your parenting time.
You may end up with supervised visitation in the future, or if the violations continue, you risk losing your custody entitlement, which could result in the other parent being granted sole legal custody and the right of final say regarding your child.
Enduring endless co-parenting disputes is exhausting. Parents typically feel emotionally drained and in a constant state of stress.
For children, they often feel increased anxiety, hopelessness, distraction in school, and a decreased sense of connection with one or both parents. It is an exhausting time for everyone.
It’s easy to feel overwhelmed. For some parents, journaling their feelings has helped them process. Mindfulness and breathing exercises can also provide parents with some needed moments of calm.
Don’t hesitate to ask for help. Seeing a therapist or mediator can offer solutions or help parents navigate the situation with more ease.
It is important to note that feeling trapped in a co-parenting war does not mean that you will lose custody. There are actionable steps that you can take today.
These steps will help you protect your time with your child and demonstrate your commitment to the co-parenting relationship in the eyes of the court.
Mediation is one way to resolve co-parenting disputes outside of court and is often quicker and cheaper than litigation. While mediation helps produce peaceful results, it will also give you useful skills to help you develop practical conflict resolution skills as long as you are ready to communicate effectively during mediation.
If mediation fails, you will have provided the court further evidence of your intentions and efforts to co-parent. Dina specializes in guiding California parents to develop solutions to reduce conflict and work together. Consider reaching out to Dina today and working through your differences in a peaceful manner.
Using designated co-parenting apps, like OurFamilyWizard or TalkingParents, will improve cooperation. These apps allow everyone to track schedules and exchanges with one another.
Keep communication neutral and short. You may also want to consider taking a co-parenting course, which will provide practical skills to better manage future disputes.
When having difficult conversations with the other parent, use collaborative language such as “Let’s work this out between us.” If you are having a hard time with the other parent, something like, “I’m really trying to reach a resolution with you, but I’m not being heard (respected, or similar words. Would you consider working with a co-parenting coach?,” would work well.
There are times when communication breaks down completely. Parallel parenting limits direct contact. Parents follow schedules and make decisions independently, either guided by a court order or by having very limited parenting rules so that each parent is far more independent.
It is intended for high-conflict situations where direct cooperation and communication are not possible, but it still allows both parents to be involved in their child’s life. The conflict between the parents is more damaging to the child, than the child’s benefits from co-parenting.
This is not open to negotiation. Sticking to the custody schedule, making support payments, and consistently adhering to all other court orders demonstrates responsibility.
Breaking orders is the fastest way to harm your position and therefore is more likely to lose custody time or decision-making authority. Compliance is a must.
It is so frustrating to try and co-parent sensibly when the other parent simply won’t cooperate. In this case, you may need to take legal action when coparenting with a narcissist.
Depending on the exact nature of the problem, this could include asking the court to enforce the existing order, holding them in contempt for violating the current order, requesting a custody evaluation to obtain an expert opinion, or seeking to modify the order entirely.
Are you feeling stuck in this one-sided battle? Dina provides focused mediation support to help California parents work through even the most challenging co-parenting disagreements.
In California, when a parent loses custody in a co-parenting relationship, it is usually due to a serious issue: visitation denial, parental alienation, or not following the court order.
Disagreements and violations can ultimately result in everything from less parenting time to sole legal and physical custody for the other parent. Communication tools and mediation can help restore stability. Each cooperative act matters.
Do you want to reduce conflict? Explore a more calmer solution by booking a free consultation with California co-parenting mediator Dina Haddad.
Judges frequently intervene. They may modify custody orders or decrease a parent’s time, or grant sole decision-making power to the more cooperative parent. Courts believe that children’s stability is a priority. High conflict cases may result in tighter restrictions or supervised visits.
This outcome is highly unusual. Most often, if a parent or parents are found to be unfit or unable to provide safe care for the child, the family or juvenile dependency courts in California will return the child to a qualified relative (such as a grandparent) or into foster care and ultimately will work on finding the child a safe home.
Courts don’t have a strict legal definition, but they are looking to see patterns that illustrate instability. The usual pattern includes things such as neglect, substance abuse, domestic violence, serious mental illness that has not been treated, and excessive changes in domicile that disrupt daily routine.
This describes a parent who creates obstacles to cooperation. Key examples of this type of behavior would be by blocking contact or visitation, ignoring schedules, refusing to provide necessary information about the child’s health or school, or just disobeying court orders. In short, they will not cooperate or be constructive, and they do not care about how that impacts the child.
